Lunch in New York City

There is a panini craze going down on 19th Street between 5th & 6th Aves. A person cannot take 5 steps without being offered a panini sample. It is a dangerous situation, if you ask me.

I don't know why all of a sudden, we are all gripped with an unnatural need to press all of our food as flat as possible in order to enjoy it. I am concerned because this feels much bigger than the "make your own salad" fad from a few years back.

You may wonder why I am concerned...

In the beginning, there were delis. They made sandwiches. You could get a Snapple. A Mars Bar. You might grab a bag of chips and be on your way. Then, the world shifted, and everyone wanted EGGS - 2 of them. ON A ROLL. WITH CHEESE.

WHAT?

DID YOU SAY, "SAUSAGE"?

Yep. Suddenly, in order to keep up, the delis, they had to figure out how to put a grill in a tiny space behind their counter.

Then came the salads.

First, in BAR FORM. We like that, at first. But then, after watching that woman wipe her nose, then her dirty son's nose, then touch the tongs for the baby corn, we weren't totally sold on the idea. IS THE SALAD BAR SANITARY? WE DON'T KNOW!!!

OK.
FINE.

We will put all the goods behind a window.
We will pre-package the lettuce, spinach, mesculen, whatever in little bowls.

YOU hand the bowl to us.

YOU tell us what you want.

WE will mix it.

OHHH WWWOOOOWWWW! HOW COOL.

So, that is how it began (I guess).

Delis forced to put in these bars of food, and staff them...

INSANE.

It didn't end with salads, either. Yeah, we are almost completely rid of unsightly, unsanitary salad bars, but now EVERYTHING WE EAT is pieced together from scratch. You know, have it YOUR way, and all that. Sometimes, I just like to go to McDonald's for the sheer fact that I can order my lunch by saying, "Number ONE, Large," and handing the surley cashier my 5 bucks. NO decisions. NO REGRETS.

NOW, if I cannot stomach fast food (or the surley cashiers, which is another entry for another day), I am forced to make all sorts of decisions when I leave the office.

1. Where will I go? (epicure, foodworks, uncle moe's)
2. What will I eat? (panini, salad, burrito)
3. What will I choose to put IN my food? (turkey, extra feta, sour cream)

And folks, I quit smoking last week. There was a minor meltdown in FOODWORKS.

I ended up with chicken salad on a roll. Hold the tomatoes.