I Feel Dirty

It is friday, and although I have been attempting to update this blog with news of the world, but someone, somewhere, at my office, is doing their damnedest to thwart my endeavors. The server simply is not allowing these posts to happen. Should I be working instead? Perhaps. I will get to that later.

A quick rundown of all things important that you probably missed from my non-posted entries:

James St. James is stalking Brandon Davis via the internet...

Debbie Rowe has put Jacko's ring on EBay (I can't find it, though - Cindy Adams told me).

I have taken a vow of silence where Brad and Jen are concerned.

This is HOT.

Linda Lovelace has finally taught us how to Deep Throat (you can learn, too, provided you know how to breathe, and don't mind the part where "your mind just gets into a whole thing where, uh, your throat does feel like a vagina...".

I apparently have become addicted to World Of Wonder. Someone STOP ME.

On Project Runway this week, Heidi said 'Auf Wiedersehen' to Alexandra, and Austin pimped out his 16 year old model - which resulted in a mention in Page Six, immunity for the next competition, and a moment of silence from my sofa when we realized that we were not going to get to see him cry like a little bitch this week.

I spent 4 hours hooking TiVo up last night because my new cable service doesn't have DVR. Who would have thought I would miss Time Warner? What are all those extra cords in the box I didn't use?

Homosexuality: SpongeBob SquarePants and the American Family Association are at "blows" over a video. Seems some conservative Christian groups have been searching for gay undertones in EVERYTHING again. James Dobson, founder of Focus on the Family, said this:

"We see the video as an insidious means by which the organization is manipulating and potentially brainwashing kids. It is a classic bait and switch."

I love it. Really. BRAINWASHING. AWESOME.